World War Z Movie Review

It might serve you well to read my review on Max Brook’s World War Z (the book this movie was based on) before reading this review. But you don’t have to. And I don’t spoil anything you can't glean from the trailer.

I was not happy when I learned that Brad Pitt was making the movie adaptation of what I felt was an epic novel. It instantly ruins the entire book. For one, the protagonist of the book is not a hero. He has nothing to do with the action of the book. He’s a UN investigator doing an after-action report of all the action that is now over. Clearly this would have to be Brad Pitt’s character. I thought to myself “Well he did do that movie Interview with a vampire I guess he can pull this off too”. When I watched the first trailer I knew my worst fears were realized.

OK, so it isn’t going to be the same as the book. It still looks like a decent zombie movie, or so I told myself walking into it on opening day. Guess what, it isn’t even a decent zombie movie. There is zero gore and hardly any blood at all. TV’s The Walking Dead is 10 times gorier than this. This is to the zombie movie genre what Twilight is to the Vampire movie genre.

Back to my comparison to its source material. Not a single thing I liked about the book is reflected in this movie. Not one. And then they add a bunch of hokiness that was just plain stupid. From the trailer you can see zombies rushing by a little Israeli boy without even touching him. Ya, that’s what I’m talking about. The best thing about zombies is there is no escape and no way out. They are mindless eating machines. But I guess when you’re Brad Pitt and your production company is ponying up all the money for a movie you’re starring in, then there has to be a way that you personally can save the whole damn planet. And did I just say “zombies rushing by”? Yes I did. In the book and I daresay in the real world, Zombies are slow, plodding creatures. Not suped-up super humans. Romero wept.

Since I love the sound of my own voice, let me quote from my review on the book: “There were so many cool things that I had never seen explored before in this genre, like what happens to zombies when they get cold, and also what happens to them when they fall in the ocean since they can’t drown. More than that though the book explores many other avenues such as what would the greatest military weapons and strategies do against an enemy like this? How do you fight against an enemy that has no feeling, no fear, no ability to negotiate or even think. And what would a civilization on the brink of complete destruction be willing to do to survive?”. Forget about it. None of this is in the movie.

Other than Pitt who are the heroes of this movie? The United Nations and the World Health Organization. Are you kidding me? Why don’t we all just gather around holding hands and sing Coom By Ya and It’s a Small World After All. I cannot describe in adequate detail how disappointed I am in this movie.

A moment of fairness. Since the time I heard they were making a movie out of the book I’ve been asking myself “how on Earth are they ever going to be able to make this into a movie?” If you’ve read the book and you know the format in which it is written you know how difficult of a task it would be. But I have figured out at least 2 different ways. How come the collective mind-set of Hollywood that has been making movies for over a hundred years couldn’t come up with a decent way to do it? The most they have come up with is moving you from one stereotypical zombie-movie closed environment to another, add things jumping out from off camera and add so many Splosions that even Jerry Bruckheimer would say “I think you over did that a bit” and you have this movie.

Do not waste your time or money. The book was a certified ReviewSpew All-star, this piece of Shite wins nary a star.


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