Taco Bell Loaded Grillers Review (Loaded Potato, Beefy Nacho, and Spicy Buffalo Chicken)

It's time for Taco Bell's monthly "new" food offering.  By new, I mean that the Taco Bell R&D department used their Christmas party to pick new menu items.  They used the "food" wheel of existing Taco Bell base food items, and spun it Pat-Sajak-style to generate these "new" offerings.

To be fair, I regularly shovel in these slimy quasi-meat items on a weekly basis.  It's comfort food for me (if only they had Diet Mt Dew..mmmm).  Thus, on my most recent visit, I picked up all 3 of their new items and a caramel apple empanada for good measure.  Please see the summary for each item below.  All 3 items were very affordable (99 cents), and the grilled tortilla added to the taste.

Loaded Potato Griller
Crispy potato bites combined with nacho cheese sauce, bacon, and reduced-fat sour cream.
Pros --
Not terrible tasting.  I couldn't decide if this was terribly average or deliciously fair.
Very large compared to what I was expecting.  At least Dirk Diggler worthy.

Cons --
The "slime quotient" is far too high.  The nacho cheese had too many avenues for escape from the flour tortilla prison.
Not enough "meaty" innards.  I had a couple bites that were just tortilla and nacho cheese.  As any person with 20/20 vision in my presence will attest while viewing my belly, dipping flour tortillas in nacho cheese is completely plausible, but even a portly fellow like me enjoys some diversity with each bite.
3 stars out of 5

Beefy Nacho Griller
Beef coupled with nacho cheese sauce and crispy red strips
I'm sorry, but this is just the Beefy Nacho burrito with red crisps instead of white ones.  I suppose you could consider this affirmative action in the burrito world.
2 stars out of 5

Spicy Buffalo Chicken Griller
Chicken with their spicy lava sauce and reduced-fat sour cream
I had high hopes for this one.  Chicken + spicy sauce + sour cream = delicious...right?  Unfortunately, my math was wrong on this one.  Maybe I should have converted to Hex, because this burrito tastes like A55.  The sauce is the culprit for failure here.  It's not appetizing, and attacked my digestive system and took no prisoners.  I like a good internal cleaning as much as the next guy, but on my terms...not in the public work restroom.
1 star out of 5

Will I order these again?  Not the spicy buffalo chicken griller, but I'll probably fall back on the other two from time to time.  They are cheap, do not taste terrible, and are affordable.  On a side-note, my local Taco Bell has a chalupa combo meal for $9.89 plus tax.  That is ridiculous.  This is the reason I am ending up at many of the other quasi-mexican food fast-service restaurants (Baja Fresh, Chipotle, Bajios) instead of Taco Bell.  They are the same price, much better tasting, and just as quick for lunch.