4.13.2010

Burger King A1 Steakhouse XT burger Review

In High School, having a thumpin' stereo in your car instantly elevated your social status to somewhere between drop out jock and FFA tough guy. 
As I shared a 1984 Honda Accord hatchback with my sister, investing money in a "system" would have been counter-productive.  I don't think I could bear hearing Debbie Gibson at 130 Db as my sister rounded the corner to our house.
I had a few friends who spent thousands on their "systems."  I explicitly remember a friend who drove a hopped up Suzuki Samurai with every spare inch of space holding some kind of speaker.  I actually think the frame was built out of large speakers.
When we'd head to lunch, he'd pop in Naughty by Nature or a little Sir Mix a lot.  At this point, the chaos would begin.
It was like hitting Omaha beach taking enemy fire.  Noises rushing by you, innards beginning to liquefy from the low-range frequencies, and a rear view mirror that was rendered utterly useless from the vibration.
On this 8 minute ride to taco time, my body took more damage than all the fights I've (almost) been involved in throughout my entire life. (1 and a half for those who are counting)

I loved the concept of the car "system," but did not like the ratio of bass to actual music.  I like the bass...but also like to hear the music.  My Samurai-driving friend was my polar opposite.  If you couldn't hear him coming from 3 blocks away, it was time for an amp upgrade.

Having a really good car "system" is really how I view the Burger King A1 steakhouse XT burger.  The ratio of this bad boy is completely out of whack.

Upon first sight, what's not to like?  Crispy onion-like strands, big hunk of meat, A1 steak sauce, and hold the mayo and tomato.  Actually, the price is what you should dislike.  The small combo is about 7 bucks.  I'll be damned if I'll spend 7 bucks at Burger King for my food.  I gladly used a coupon to buy this combo for under 5 bucks. (I'm not below handing a drive-thru attendant a paper coupon if it will save me at least 1 dollar)

This bad boy burger has some real heft.  I was surprised that Burger King didn't give this burger it's own box, and instead wrapped it in paper.  I kind of feel that the quality of a burger increases 15% just by placing it in a cardboard box.  Needless to say, it's got to weigh at least 8-12 ounces.

The first few bites were actually pleasurable.  The mix of meat, fake onion-bits, and A1 sauce was not altogether terrible.  The fake liquid smoke taste melded well with the fake liquid steak taste in the "meat." (I can see the Burger King designers placing the meat goo into the press to form the burger, and injecting the liquids to simulate real grilled steak burger taste.  A thing of beauty.)

But eventually, the heavy handed beef(like) patty started to become dangerously overpowering.  Each ensuing bite became a marathon of chewing and eye-watering.  It was the Suzuki Samurai all over again.  The ratio of meat to other stuff was far too much, and I threw away the final third of the burger.
I'm no light-weight, but the thought of eating another one of these quasi-meat patties again conjures up raw negative emotions.

In retrospect, I should have known better.  I have previously eaten one of McDonald's Angus burgers with similar results. (although they served theirs in a cardboard box)  I shouldn't be buying Naughty by Nature when I'm more of a Foo Fighters kind of guy.

2 stars for initial palate pleasure and the ability to feel like I "won" by using a coupon. 

1 comments:

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